Monday Night Football - Fantasy Preview - Week 4

October 3, 2022

A weekly newsletter for members of the Harry Koch Memorial Cup Fantasy Football league - all others will HAVE THEIR CHILI COOK OFF FAMILY RECIPE OPPENLY MOCKED IN THE TOWN SQUARE

Koch Safari League Preview Watch Guide for Tonight

This week - I lost… and as a result… I’m sad… and I likely have covid.. and im living at my grandparents house.. and they do have covid.. but.. in the grand scheme of things… I am happy.. because yahoo says… that a happy life.. is one where you are ranked highly in the power rankings… and in those… im ranked #1. Find what makes you happy, hold it, cherish it, let it make you whole again. This week saw no true blowouts but little legitimate drama heading into MNF. Spooky SZN is quickly approaching, so go BOO on the waivers this week and please please please fill up my cup (with dayquill)


(2-1) Los Angeles Rams @ (1-2) San Francisco 49ers

  • 8:15 PM EST
  • Line: SF -1.5


✅ Scott (3-0) v Keith (2-1)

What do you call the manager with both the most points for, and least points against? Answer: 4-0 year old sturgeon. Scott played another near perfect lineup this week and rode his stable stable of stallions this week in an easy victory over Keith Gringas”s FF team. Not too much Keith could have done in this one, as he saw the #1 overall pick JTaylor drop a season low and pick up a minor ankle injury on Sunday. Look for Scott to claim this victory as one of skill, Keith to teeter on the brink of becoming disengaged in league chatter, and for me to continue to cry cry cry myself to sleep in the coming days in this one.

✅ Hy (3-0) v Diego (1-2)

The bad man from down under correctly picked the Let Russ Cook breakout game of the season in this one as Diego was handed an always painful “score over 120 but lose” decision. Two great lineups from these two as Hy moves to 4-0, in a dogfight with Scott at the top of the league. Diego will look to rebound against Matt #1 next week - and will spend the majority of this upcoming week presumably living a peaceful and happy life - detached from the toxic emotional and physical dependencies to this league that many of us hold dear.

99% Daniel (0-3) v Patrick (2-1)

The most FF points a kicker has every scored is 29.5 back in 2010 by Jay Feely. Patrick is going to need about that tonight to overcome a current 18 pt deficit + cover whatever kittle scores. Lets hope the honerable demigod from the robotripping botony convention is feeling gay as hell after Gay’s performance tonight. Broncos country lets ride manager Dan appears poised to obtain his first win of the season in this one - with a formidable lineup just beginning to take form. Dan’s optimal lineup this week would have gone for 155+

98% Nick (1-2) v Matt #2 (0-3)

Matt #2 needs the big bad D boys from SF to go for 28+ tonight in order to make this one interesting. Nick aka EZ/PZ BB wasn’t playing around as the vast majority of this team overperformed against expectations. This loss would drop Matt #2 to sole posession of last place in the league begging the question - was Matt #2 a better FF manager when he was burdened with immense physical and emotional trauma by his musky overlords. Has Matt found more time to tinker? His 2 moves on the season say otherwise. Has Matt lost his edge - again his latest rage against the machine <> Carly Rae Jepson cover again says otherwise. Matt #2 will be left seeking truth after this one.

96% Alex (2-1) v James (1-2)

In one of the bad blood grudge matchups of the week - the bloody leaky cauldron british prime minister manager from across the pond finally found the breakout game from his team namesake TJ Hockenson and blasted to a 50 point lead over Jam heading into MNF. James will need Deeboo and the LA Rams to somehow allow each other to score a lot of points. Lamar failed jam in this one, I reckon he might want to orchestrate a trade for a mariota type if he wisens up to it. Possible that Alex moves into sole posession of third place after this one, an honor that I would imagine could embolden him to run for mayor of royal oak.

71% Matt #1 (1-2) v Skylar (2-1)

IT’S THE MAIN EVENT - in one corner: with a 20 point lead and Jeff Wilson Jr. at RB 2 …. IT’S DR PENDANSKIS NEMISIS - MR I LIKE DIGGIN HOLES HECTOR ZERONI HIMSELF … MATT. And in this west wing… THE TEAM THE TEAM THE TEAM mr #4 in the nation and $5 in the league.. SKYLAR DIGGINS and Cooper KUPPPPPPPP. It is going to need to be all kupp all the time for Skylar to make this one interesting tonight. Will Skylar’s Kupp overfloweth? Or will it biodegrade like an unsealed jar of sploosh - TUNE IN TONIGHT TO FIND OUT

Biggest blowout bonus advanced analytics

For this first time in a while, there are multiple matchups with a legitimate shot of claiming the biggest blowout of the week. Heading into tonight’s game, the projected margins of victory stand at:

  • Alex: 26.59
  • Scott: 22.52 (locked barring stat corrections)
  • Dan: 21.17
  • Nick: 15.99

We have never had a week with all the matchups this close. Tune in tonight to see who comes away with the “OHHHHHH YEA THATS GOOD - Burlap Bandicoot Ida Potato BIGGEST SACK OF THE WEEK” and don’t you DARE forget to text your Mom and tell her that you love her this Mother’s day - only 223 days away.