Monday Night Football - Fantasy Preview - Week 7

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Koch Safari League Preview Watch Guide for Tonight

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Forward

8 started players still to see action, 4 matchups still to be decided, 1 game remaining. Week 7 has featured a number of nail biting finishes across the league, with 8 of the 13 games so far finishing within one score. It looks as though the fantasy league will experience the same as 4 of 6 matchups are projected to finish within 5 points. As we cross past the halfway point of the season, look for a couple teams to make season defining statements in tonight’s MNF game to solidify VITAL wins or commit MORTIFYING gaffs as they plunge their playoff hopes into the toilet.

Game

(5-1) Chicago Bears @ (4-2) Los Angeles Rams

• 8:15 PM EST
• Line: LA -5.5

Matchups

✅ Hy (4-2) v Cam (3-3) aka “The battle for Camp Green Lake”

In what could possibly be the closest fantasy finish of the year, Hy squeaked out a .46 pt victory against the Kamarican Dream after a marathon SNF game finalized with Kyler Murray completing his final pass with seconds remaining in OT to seal the deal. In a contest that remained neck and neck for most of the weekend, the collective league is with Cam in spirit after this crushing loss. When Cam goes back to review his week, he may think hard on why he ever thought starting a Giant (Devonta - .8 pts)was a good idea, or how Stafford could play so well, and get so few (18 pts on 340 pass yards) fantasy points. Hy truly owes the little teapot, short and stout 38 pt Kyler everything after this one. Look for him to erect a temple or shrine in his honor under the burnt orange tumble weeded Austin sky.

✅ Alex (3-3) v Matt #1 (5-1) aka “The battle for Michigan’s 4th quadrant”

Fresh off his dramatic and questionably deserved miracle victory in week 6, Alex left no doubt in this one delivering a 20 pt power thumping to Matt #1’s delicate yet formidable tush in this week’s likely BUILT FORD TOUGH - OUCHY OUCHY POWER THRASH. Powered largely in part by a monster 38 pt effort from Davante Adams, a team has no name was certainly playing with dark magic as Matt’s heroic 32 and 23 pt efforts from Russell Wilson and DJ Moore were not enough to cover the pt vacuum caused by the cumulative failure of Chase “the future of everything” Claypool’s .3 pt evening and Green Bay’s AJ “oh dope, I get to dress?” Dillon’s 1.1 pt affair. This will be just the second loss sustained by the flattened chubbs, so look for Matt to extract some pent up 10 year old roommate aggression next week against Keith.

86% Nick (5-1) vs Scott (2-4) aka “Ya done GOFFED YOURSELF BROTHER”

Daaaaaaaa PEARS, are all that Nick must conquer to escape this one with a win and sole control over first place in the league. Trailing by almost 10 points, Scott is hoping for a strong showing from the accidental leaders of the NFC North in sunny LA tonight. Proving to be a frustrating first round pick, Michael Thomas failed to return to action this week for the 6th straight week after he allegedly injured his hamstring in practice - begging the question.. is Michael Thomas just a flat out bad guy? Look for Nick to send a large number of messages to the chat in the coming few hours and look for Scott to send a large number of malicious DMs to Jared Goff’s IG account. If the game turns into a barn burner or there is a Khalil Mack “napsack” Sack parade, this one could get very interesting!

75% Matt #2 (3-3) v Diego (1-5) aka “Where in the world is Carmen Diego”

In the matchup with the most roster slots still to take the field, Matt #2 currently leads by 24 pts. Diego has Ram RB Henderson, Ram WR Woods, and Ram Defense remaining, while Matt holds the Ram Kicker and Bear RB Montgomery. Hard to speculate too much on what could happen, but a Ram’s blowout likely works in Diego’s favor. The surley men suffered from the classic curse of Mahomes being a capable and efficient game manager as he amassed only 12 points on 200 passing yards and a TD in the Chief’s 27 pt blowout of the Broncos. As Diego fights to rise from the dregs of the league and avoiding the last place punishment, he has to be asking himself, “am I having fun?”, “was joining this league a good idea?”, and “siri, how can you undo a venmo payment?”. If Matt #2 pulls out a win here, he would improve to over 500 and would be laying out a significant case for his #2 Matt status to elevate to #1 (most week 7 wins of any Matt in the league and tie for most of any Matt in a given league during week 7 worldwide).

67% Patrick (1-5) vs Keith (3-3) aka “Jimmy - come inside, no time to play”

Holding a 99% win probability heading into the SNF matchup, Patrick saw his gaudy 56 point lead evaporate before his dilated and frantic eyes at the hands of a season high 45.5 pt performance from Tyler Lockett of the Seahawks. 20 targets, 200 yards, and 3 wet ass tuddys later and here we sit, a 10.64 pt lead for the pleading, deserving, and nourishing Robotrippin Gardner with Sorry Ms. Jackson’s Jimmy “a gardener until saturday” Graham still to take the field. Graham’s yahoo projection sits at 7.54 with half of his past games going over 10 points. I understand Patrick will be taking a vision quest in a the remote corners of cambodia during the game tonight citing simply, “I cannot be hurt in my castle amongst the clouds”. Look for at least one of these two managers to not be happy in the coming hours and remember, remember, the 26th of October - the day Tyler “Pop Drop and” Lockett scratched his malignant initials across the impressionable retinas of the unsuspecting nation.

64% Jam (3-3) vs Dan (3-3) aka “Toucan Jam and Beluga Dan”

In the closest contest yet to be finalized, 3-3 Christian McDeads and 3-3 Last Chance U (suck) remain interlocked in a death spiral like a pair of mating Bald Eagles. In the marathon SNF game, Dan was able to ride the iron boot of Cardinal Kicker Zane Gonzalez out to an 8.8 pt lead over Jam and Allen Robinson II. Look for Jimmy to likely not get any work done today as he worries about the coming matchup, and possibly about if the Wolverines will execute as the 24 point favorites over the Spartans this upcoming weekend. Dan got a total of 3.6 points from his QB and WR1 this week, as he finally got around to benching Joe Burrow just in time for his 35 pt coming out party in the battle for Ohio. Nice, also watch out for Mixon and McCaffrey to come back in the coming weeks ~ spooky like Cam Newton’s future!

TiL Week 7 Fun Facts

• The Falcons win probability in the 4th quarter: 99.9% vs Cowboys, 99.6% vs Bears, 95.9% vs Lions. They lost all 3 games.
• Woke: Blue Pant Jim